This Conversation Seems Like A Dream

Wedding wrap-up.

Yep, we're home. Had a wonderful vacation, but I'm SO glad to be back home, sleeping in my own bed, with my car downstairs, and...yeah.

So, I figured I should write up a summary of the week of the wedding. If you're not interested, don't read. :) Pictures will be forthcoming later on!

'At least one thing will go wrong, I'm sure.' This is the advice that I kept giving myself in the days before my wedding, though I'm not sure I realized just how true those words would be. 'No matter what happens, the end result will be the same--I'll be wearing that ring on my finger.' Well. True enough. Still, here's the wrap-up, just because, starting with the beginning of the week.

Tuesday: Though I'd thought Tuesday would be a day I'd have to myself, it didn't really turn out that way. It started early for me, I had to make a run to the florist, then to Michael's and Costco, and *then*, I had to go back out to shop for the reception with Mark. We talked about logistics and various things, and once we were finally back and had all the food stored in the rental apartment that Brett's parents were sharing, it was time for Matt to come help me clean. I am still just beyond grateful for his help, he got the kitchen looking just absolutely marvelous. We watched Boy Meets Boy, cheered when James chose Wes, and then waited for Brett's parents to arrive, which they finally did, sometime after 11. After they got here, I fell into bed, where I promptly ended up staying awake for ages, with the list of things we had still to do running through my head.

Wednesday: I actually ended up with a lot of time to myself, mostly because everyone was figuring I was already busy enough, I think. My dress didn't arrive Wednesday, though I was told on Sunday that it would, so I was trying not to panic about that. I went to Watercourse Way, spent an hour in the hot tub, and got a lovely facial--incredibly relaxing, very nice. I thought I'd be coming home and going to bed, but Brett was off to his bachelor party, and I went out to dinner with his parents, instead--which was really very nice. Came home, went to bed, same restless sleep for the second night in a row. Arrg. :)

Thursday: The airport day. I also had to deliver ribbon to the cake lady, but got to see the top two layers--which looked just absolutely stunning. I left the ribbon in her capable hands, and was really looking forward to see how the cake turned out. Brett and I went out to breakfast with my mom and her boyfriend Matt (who will be known as Matt-North for the rest of this post, for reasons that will shortly become apparent) and by the time that was all said and done, it was time to go to the airport to pick up Andrea, my maid of honor. Once we were all back home again, Andrea tried on her stuff, and I tried on mine--once more, we had sizing issues. Her overskirt and bodice were a little bit too big (but done extremely well, considering that all Hallie had to work with were measurements!), and my underskirt was too small. *And*, once again, the sleeves were bad. Sigh. :) All that caused some panic on my end, until we got ahold of the person who'd actually made my dress, whereupon he gave us advice on how to fix it.

The rehearsal happened shortly thereafter, and was quite a bit shorter than I thought it was going to be. I thought we might run through it more than once, but all she had us do was walk down the 'aisle', and recite a bit of the vows. Firmed up the time at which we were all supposed to meet, and that was it. I gave everyone's gifts at that point: Andrea's jewelry box with her necklace and bracelet, and the mothers both got Irish linen handkerchiefs with a necklace and bracelet, as well. My mom cried, reading the poem included in the plastic hanky box. Matt-South, who'd helped me clean on Tuesday (and the reason for the designations) showed up then, and was the lifeline that he'd been for several days previous. We all agreed to adjourn and meet at 6:30 at the apartment where Brett's folks were staying, for the formal dinner. Reverend Karen didn't hang around, but we did clear up the time at which she was supposed to be there--she thought it was 3pm rather than 12:30, eek!

Matt-South and I went to Costco to get flowers, and it was almost entirely painless, yay. Sat by the pool with my mom, Brett's mom, Andrea, and Devin (Brett's middle brother) for a little while, before Mom and I went to go pick up Jeremy (my brother, henceforth known as Jeremy-TB--the brother) from the airport. When we got back, allllll my family came over: Leslie and her partner Chris, Leslie's godmother Sue, Andrea, and Teri (another aunt), along with Matt-North--and, at that point, we all trucked on over for the dinner. It was pretty high comedy, I have to say (a lot of things were, over the past few days): by the time that contingent arrived, Andrea and Sue had already had quite a bit to drink. Finally, we got them all herded over to the other apartment, where introductions and much loud chatter ensued. Andrea and I were not there for very long, but were there for long enough for me to open the gift that my aunt Teri had with her--a handmade quilt that's just...well. Just stunning. I'll post pictures.

At 8, Matt-South, Andrea, and I went back over to our apartment, as Hallie was going to fix the dresses. By the time Hallie got there, Sue, Leslie, Chris, and Teri had migrated our way, followed shortly by Jeremy-TB, my mom, and Matt-North. I think we may have overwhelmed the Cashmans a little bit. I forget how loud my family can get.

Hallie worked some amazing magic on my underskirt (the sleeves will get done later) and Andrea's dress--by the time she was finished, the underskirt fit perfectly, and Andrea's bodice and overskirt likewise were perfect fits. Andrea looked absolutely beautiful, as I figured she would. Matt-South left, but not after some very profuse thank-yous on my part--he really was my sanity more often than he probably knew. Jeremy and Clay came by for a very low key bachlorette party; they'd gone to Target and picked up things they said reminded them of me: ring pops, gummi sharks, lucky charms, and candy necklaces/bracelets. Andrea ended up with a blue raspberry ring pop that, by the end of the night, had totally turned her mouth and teeth a very dark blue. Much fun was had, and I turned into a pumpkin pretty early.

Friday: 5am, the alarm goes off. Shortly thereafter, Mark arrived, and we put meat in three separate ovens around the complex. He went off to get some sleep, and I tried to get a little bit of napping time in, but it didn't do me a whole lot of good. Initially, the plan was going to be that I'd go up to the site sometime around 8:30am, so that I could figure out how I wanted to lay things out, and give people instructions accordingly. It didn't end up working out like that, however. By the time I got the car loaded with soda and a few other things from the apartment that Brett's folks were staying in, and swung by the apartment where my family was staying, it was 9:00am--and, Brett called, saying that Brenda (the braider) was already at the apartment. This freaked me out, she was initially supposed to come at 10, but after a brief moment of panic, my mom sorted everything out: she, Matt, and Jeremy-TB would go to the site and get everything started, while Andrea and I went to go get braided, and they'd come get me at noon. It would mean that I wouldn't see the site, but ah well. I called Jeremy to let him know about the change of plan, and just dealt with it.

Being braided was awesome. She did Andrea's hair first, more so that I could calm down than anything, and it was just amazing, watching the intricate stuff she did with all that hair. From the nape of her neck upwards, there was a braid that had to have 11 or more strands in it, it was that complex, but it looked freaking cool. As it turns out, it was good that Brenda was early, because I have so much hair, and all the stuff she did with it ended up taking her much more time than I'd originally thought. It looked just amazing by the time she was done, though--just absolutely amazing.

The less said about the whole food thing, the better, I think. Let's just say that the time between when Brenda left and when we finally got on the road was the most stressful part of the whole damn day. Bad planning, somewhere in there--why five people ended up scattered across three different apartments picking up food, well...I think that happened more because I never said 'hey, at 11:30, some two or three people need to come back to the apartment to help us.' Note to self: details matter. ;) The cap of that hour and a half of hell was me slamming the pinky finger of my right hand in the trunk of my car, which sent my body into immediate shutdown. Ouchie.

Finally, we got to the site, though I have no idea how late I was. Several people swarmed the cars to empty out all the food, and Jeremy and Andrea helped me get dressed, while Leon took pictures, agh. :) Someone brought the bouquet to me, and it was just amazingly beautiful. Bouttonieres were distributed, as were hand corsages, and everyone looked just stunning. While I greeted a few people and apologized for being late, others were commandeered to make an altar for the unity candle--I was supposed to bring a TV tray for it, but utterly forgot. I also forgot my something new, an amber pendant that Jeremy and Leon gave me for my birthday--arrrrgh. It would've looked so perfect with the dress.

Once the altar was done, the aisle runner was pulled out, and finally, the ushers (Brett's brothers and Matt-South) and the best man (Graham) seated the family members for whom we had chairs, and everyone else started lining up. I don't know whether it was by accident or by design, and whether my perception of it is skewed, but there seemed to be fewer people on the groom's side of the crowd.

Rev. Karen and Brett walked down to the arch and makeshift altar, and Graham and Andrea soon followed. Next up: Matt-North and I. He took half a step forward and I didn't move at first, but after one deep, centering breath...off we went. I wish I could remember what he said to make me laugh as we were walking down the aisle. I kept looking into the assembled guests and seeing people I hadn't greeted, so I tried to make eye contact with them, in between peeks down the aisle toward Brett, standing there at the end. Graham, Andrea, and Rev. Karen were there, but...I didn't see them. Next thing I knew, Matt-North was giving me away, I was handing my bouquet over to Andrea, and putting my hands in Brett's.

The ceremony opened with a poem: http://andreloveskarla.s5.com/peom.htm, and even from the first words out of her mouth, I was already crying. Brett kept poking my fingers to get me to smile, and it worked, but never for very long at a stretch. Once the poem was finished, the tears stopped running quite so freely, but my eyes weren't completely dry again until the end. We said 'I do,' and tried to light the unity candle, just as the breeze kicked in--high comedy, trust me. Graham was trying to light the tapers, and we couldn't get them lit. Finally, we held the tapers over the pillar and got all three of them to light for a second or two, but not without much laughter and cat calling (all good natured, of course) from the guests.

Rev. Karen read a lovely piece to our families: today, your family gains a son/daughter--take him/her into your heart and love them as you would your own child, brother, or sister. I wish I could remember the exact wording, it was beautiful. It was addressed to one family at a time, though, and as she was speaking to my family, my mom gave Brett a double thumbs-up. Richard (his dad) did the same, when Rev. Karen was speaking to them, and that made me laugh.

Sharing the rings also brought a note of comedy--because of the heat and humidity outside, our fingers were swollen, so getting the rings on the fingers was amusing, but still...wow. Just wow. We shared our first kiss as husband and wife, and walked back down the aisle together--not without making the officiant cry, as well. The ceremony itself was simple and heartfelt, I think, and everyone who was there has had lovely things to say about it, which makes me happy. No bubbles for us as we walked down the aisle, but we did get some as we walked back toward the tables.

Cue the reception: much good food and a fun party, with so much time spent on my feet that I think they're still revolting, even several days later. But Dave and Balaji (from work) were there, which made me really happy. Auntie Marilyn and Uncle Rudy were there, as was my cousin Sandy, and they had lots of pictures to share. Rudy showed me a picture of Lynn and Rory, who are big in the Renaissance Faire out here, so that I could spot them next time we go. Some of Brett's family: Uncle Tim and Aunt Marian, and Arthur (a cousin). A good number of our friends: Melissa and Chris (who picked up the flowers, yay!), Helene and Scott, Francesca, Zjonni (who heard about it only a few days before--I'm so thrilled he was there), Hallie and Charles, TC, Debbie and Rhonda (friends of my mom, who are also friends of mine), Brandie, Sara and Andrew...I'm sure I'm forgetting people, but wow. It was truly awesome to have everyone there, it made my afternoon.

Graham's best man speech was truly something to behold, as well. He got in a few sharp but very good-natured digs, and also said some really lovely things. Funny that his friends are jealous of the time he spends with me, when I have likewise sometimes been jealous of the time he spends with them.

The cake looked just incredible, and tasted delicious! I will most definitely buy from Erika the next time I need a cake for any sort of event, it just looked...wow. We have tons of pictures of the cake, given how many people asked for it: Kathy, the ribbon lady; Arlette, the florist, and of course, Erika herself. I'll also probably send one to Fellowship Foundry, too, so they can see what we did with their cake topper.

The clean-up, when it was done, was quick and painless, and I barely had to do anything. The whole event was like that, all I really did was show up, which speaks to how wonderful our friends and family are. A good time seemed to be had by all, and in spite of those couple of hours where I was stressed and upset...it truly was the best day of my life. I can't wait for all the rest--and I can't find words to describe how much it thrills me to see that ring on my finger...almost as much as it thrills me to see it on his.

Okay, just one picture...

Posted by Liz at September 18, 2003 08:54 AM