Spawning Queen

Kassima: "So you want to have a baby! Excellent! Have you a father in mind...? Oh, good. Then you won't mind my suggesting one for you? Actually, hmm, it might be best if you had babies with two men... no, wait, hear me out; see, this guy is on the Tree, and if you spawn with him, then with this other guy, you'll bring yourself, and him, and all of his other progeny onto the Tree too! It'd be great! Hey, where are you going? Come back! We haven't decided who's to father your third baby yet!"

Note: Normally I don't double up on filks, I swear, but one night while we were chatting about who was spawning with whom in Igen, U'yn called me 'such a spawn queen' and that got this filk started in my head. That's why I blame this filk entirely on U'yn. I'll get my revenge after we spawn those K-named octuplets together, just watch. But for now, I can only offer ABBA my sincerest apologies for abusing 'Dancing Queen' yet again--and also give them full credit for the initial, which makes much more sense than this thing.

Spawning Queen

You can pimp for your Tree, telling your friends they should breed--
Draw those charts, match those genes, beware the Spawning Queen!

Late at night and the lights are low;
Watch the couples, see where they go.
When they go somewhere private, your plotting begins:
You suggest they should have twins. 

Nobody is safe from your plan,
Whether they are woman or man.
A new link for your tree-chart, you're bound to devise--
And if nothing else will do,
You'll ask them to spawn with you. 

You are the Spawning Queen, Pern's next answer to Kitti Ping.
Spawning Queen, pairing lines like we've never seen.
You can pimp for your Tree, telling your friends they should breed--
Draw those charts, match those genes, beware the Spawning Queen!

You're obsessive, you study names,
Blend this with that like it's a game.
Listening for rumors, asking who's with whom--
From Yggdrasil, it's true,
Those who escape are few.... 

You are the Spawning Queen, Pern's next answer to Kitti Ping.
Spawning Queen, pairing lines like we've never seen.
You can pimp for your Tree, telling your friends they should breed--
Draw those charts, match those genes, beware the Spawning Queen!

			    ---Written by Kassima

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